Thursday, September 11, 2014

The Power of Intention

What is the intent of our life?

The Power of Intention can be the difference of whether the pendulum of our lives swing from one extreme of the light unto the other of the darkness. What we entertain, what we think about, and how we think we align ourselves in life can lead to who we become. It can also lead to fate(if such a thing is).

Even if we are doing something positive, how much negativity is within it? Even if we are doing something negative, how much positivity is within in? How can we purify our intentions unto a state beyond justification or sanctification? I believe we can be justified or sanctified without religion, philosophy, or politics.

In Goth, I believe I had embraced a more or less Romantic side with disciplines of chivalry. With chivalry, I believe that it lives on in the hearts and mind of those who choose to embrace such ideas.

Mischeif should never find us and peace should be our ideal. Childish things (as nostalgic as they might be) must fade away in order for us to grow more fully into the thing that it is that we are.

Goth has had centuries to grow and expand beyond the pale of what it once was. Goth did not always embrace the ideals of "darkness" as they do in todays commercial world. Since the 70's, rebellion may be apart of change and Goth influence, but for some reason it seemed to trend when certain people were concerned with their ideologies whatever they may have been.

In Goth or Life, we can "intend" to embrace what we want and discard the rest. Our moral or ethical character determines how we express our path.

Goth -to me- is a sense of understanding the "realness" of life, and its certain ending in death. This is not to mean anything fatalistic. It simply means a realistic outlook on life, seeking truth, and avoiding that of which does not compass the heart. Be true to thine-self. Live not in lies or denial.

The things we think about -like intentions- can be very dangerous. It is easy to get swept away with any form of ideology: politics, religion, life-style. What is most import is to separate the wheat from the chaff. Or basically separating what is important and necessary from what is not. All of these things stem from intention.

As a Goth, what is our Gothic-Intention? Do we intend Gothic-Darkness, or, Gothic-Light?

Do we intend good or evil? Do we intend right or wrong? Do we intend truth or lie?

Our intentions with others is the same way. Even the chaos theory states the power of the fluttering of a butter-flys wings. So too is the power of intention in our relations and interactions with others. Do we intend to engage in good prosperous relations or destroy those around us? The strongest of people have weakness and vice versa for the weak.

Most people do not seem to think before they speak. We live almost seemingly reactionary lives. Stimulation becomes input; Our reactions become spontaneous output. If we think before we either speak or act, the possibility is greater that we cause less harm of infractions upon one another and ourselves. You might ask, "Why should I care?" The fact is that we all live in one world. And each of us has only one life. Our world and lives are interconnected in ways that are beyond our abilities to comprehend. If we "intend" to live life for ourselves and no one else, we come to find that form of intention whithers and dies as no leaf or branch lives for very long cut from the Tree of Life.

Just think, "If all of our lives are interconnected in one way or another -like relationships- why would I not want to intend to do the best I can for myself and others?" There may be some amount of truth that, "Good deeds do not go unpunished."  This might be true for action and reaction on some level, but from my experience, "One good deed can be life changing in positive ways for ourselves and others."

Intend for the best in all things: Goth, Life, Love.

Monday, September 8, 2014

Through the Pipes -Memories.

Currently Listening: Type-O-Negative "October Rust"

Is it just me, or does listening to some classic Goth Rock/Metal inspire you? It's like driving down back-roads getting drunk or high with your best friends. And, at the same time listening to all the underground Metal or other styles of music that confirm how truly alive you are.

Type-O-Negative "October Rust" album is one of those albums that brings out the: fear, the pain, the happiness, the joy,...the love. I remember and feel so much when I listen to this album.

R.I.P. P.S. -Sometimes I wish they were still around. Makes me think about all the friends and few lovers that I have ever had.

It's not October yet, but...I feel the cold(not a bad chill) of remembrance and reflecting on life(as if I ever stop reflecting). What is is that makes us, us? What happens to all of our memories when we are no more, or sadly by chance we forget them?

What price would you pay or what would you do in order to feel everything that felt so right to you?

If you could go back in your life and correct things, or start your life over again, what would you do?

If you lost someone, or someone died, and you could say anything to them right now, what would you say? (I would say I love you and hug them as long and as hard as I could.)

One time my friend got some Mezcal. Kind of bad to go to the bathroom and start tripping. Everything kind of flies out of both ends, and then you realize how far up in the air you are when you sit on the pot (gross, I know right?).

Anyway, during my experience(trip) I saw everyone and everything I loved. Then, it seemed as if I was viewing my entire life and memories "through the pipes." I've been taught to be cold, unemotional, and as tough as all the other bad-ass men in the world. But, I realize they all die no matter how bad they are.

Now,  I just want to live -by the powers that be all I want is to live in freedom and peace. To be able to experience all the beauty of life and have great experiences. It's been a hard ride to be myself as it is for all people.

Lately, think I punish myself more for not taking out more time and making more quality experiences with the people who have meant the most to me. Being a human-animal-creature-thing is the most confusing and easy thing to fuck up in the entire world.

Maybe...I'm fucked up like everyone else because I don't know any other way. Maybe...I'm pure and sanctified because I see what the world is and what it is not. Maybe...I'm alone because I'm cursed and damned by other cursed and damned people who have failed at life but consider my failures worse than there own.

In the end, well...it is not over until it's over. And, we just do whatever we do in the mean-time(mean time, get it?).

Right now, beautiful Type-O music in my ear, this screen, pouring through thoughts that might mean nothing to anyone but me, used by my enemies and haters to destroy me, laughed at by those more elite and intelligent than me -----but, in this moment ---all my family, my friends(most now past or gone away), these few empty breaths ----my empty cold lips....

..."through the pipes of my memories, I reach out to live". Think something has happened to me, something I don't understand. Like I know and feel everything is ok and has a reason even if I never understand it.

Although I am alone, despised, and think good thoughts(moral character and all) maybe at some point in my small life of humility, maybe hope and good things will smile on me.

I have been thinking/Meditating(if you will) on eight words. No religious or philosophical links. Just words to think on. They are:

Faith - Maybe aspire to think greater thoughts for others and ourselves.
Moral excellence - Maybe be strong enough to have good character.
Knowledge - Always study and learn (I'm slow so I always need to improve this one.)
Temperance - Moderation in all things I guess.
Patience - Be able to stand resolute, understand cycles of time, and be willing to deal.
Godliness - Um, maybe just an idea to shoot for in being the best we can be as people.
Brotherly/Sisterly Kindness - Simple being good to other people (helps in a world like this.)
Love - Perhaps the greatest treasure we can ever experience or know (One day I will find this.)


To all my friends and family, and Goths -maybe one day we can have the best. Maybe things can be better than memories and yet, maybe we will be able to make the best memories that live beyond the veils of life and death.