Saturday, August 19, 2017

Open Letter to the band "TOOL"

Dear Tool

I still appreciate you, but, I no longer appreciate your music.

I feel the same about: Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, Dimmu Borgir, Static-X, Garbage, A Perfect Circle, All metal bands, All modern music in general. And even artists Alex Grey, Dali, and H.R. Giger.

The first Tool album I ever bought was “Aenima”. I thought it was the most awesome album I had ever heard. Although, overtime, the more I read the “lyrics” and read up on the members -like the other bands- I felt extremely let down.

I felt let down because, “How could all of these people with so much talent, ability, and life express themselves as so vile, shallow, and possessed of vanity and illusion?”

I used to have a friend who basically worshiped Tool and Maynard. He had all of the Tool albums. Slowly, I listened to each album repeatedly, read the lyrics, watched the interviews; A band that I once thought was really as awesome, amazing, and as beautiful became as “nothing.”

Danny Carey - At first, I really thought he was an out-of-this world drummer. Then, I studied polyrhythm’s that he talked about and spent a great deal of time studying world music. Also, that of the drummers that he talked about. I started to see what he was talking about: lots of practice and learning from others. I no longer saw him as much of a great drummer as I viewed him more as an “applied student.”

Adam Jones - He never struck me as an excellent technical player. The only thing I thought was good was that, “He established his own sound.” Psychedelic guitar is what it is. Most of what he and the bass player did came out of Carey’s foundation which, made the “Metallica” they were pulling sound much more elaborate than it really was. Throw in some psychedelic blues, a very eastern progressions, feedback and effects -walah.

Bass Player(Justin Chancelor & Paul D’Amour) - Like Jones, they did the metallic-double so to speak, although they seemed to play different things, progression-wise, album to album, there really wasn’t any sweeping difference. I kind of felt bad for the bass player(both) they more I read on him(them); What he had to deal with as far as all the legal and internal band conflicts. Maybe it’s a curse that bass players always get faded, shafted, or re-run and replayed.

Maynard James Keenan - You know, it amazes me that someone who seemingly sounds “awesome on the album thanks to the studio” never seems to par up “live.” I know because I have seen Tool in concert. It always strikes me that bands use studio-tricks and concert-tricks that they would never be able to pull off without them. There are times he sounds “beautiful” and you would assume the lyrics have meaning, other than being abstract, non-sensical, and more often than not harsh, abrasive, let downs of vocal expression. The more interviews I watched of Maynard…it was an extremely sad thing to see someone with so much talent and ability that, you see the negativity, the vile poison, the possession of desire to “spew.”

Dear Tool -and other bands- , I still appreciate you and “some” of what you do. However, maybe I naively wish that “bands and artists who are supposedly the best of the best” didn’t turn out to be less than what and who they are. I never had any real expectation of musicians and artists because, “I am a musician and artist who loves to listen to and learn from other artists.” Although, the more I listen, and learn, and think about what “my peers’ are doing,…I don’t know -I just don’t feel the same any more.

Vanity and illusion have always been the “corner-stones” of entertainment. It’s not that I am unhappy or displeased. Perhaps it just the fact that I do not desire vanity or illusion anymore. Maybe make-believe and pre-tend aren’t as important as: truth, understood communication, and perhaps “real enlightened sobriety” so-to-speak.

Dear Tool, I do sincerely feel bad about all the struggles that you have had to go through legally, musically, and health-wise. In some way, I sincerely wish your music held the same beauty, purity, and truthful expressive beauty that I once thought it expressed.

I don’t want to think that all of life is vanity and illusion. I don’t want the thrill too be gone. I never thought any of you were powerful or magical in a music sense. Honestly, I thought of all of you as good friends having fun and living life. I don’t see that anymore.

As much as I don’t want to let you go, I understand all things are impermanent and temporal at best. There is even a part of me that wished I could see you in concert again before you and I are no more of this world. I don’t judge you but I don’t feel the same way. For me, it’s not about sex, drugs, rock and roll, or even metaphysical mumbo jumbo. In sincerest honesty, you and other bands for me were about life, good memories, and good times.

Dear Tool,

I loved you once, I still do, but not your music and especially not a majority of your lyrics. I no longer have any of your albums, just an old T-Shirt. I wish you nothing but the best.


Friday, August 18, 2017

2050 - The Point of no Return - The Coming Darkness

.........I have had this dream. A nightmare. 2050.

It always seems to happen the same way. The perfect storm of all events happening now, the madness starting in 2025,...the lights, the dust,...countless bodies rolling in burning electric waves.
I awake in sweat. Shaken. On fire.

When I was very young, I studied the ancient leaderships of ancient kingdoms. How to govern and the principles of higher order leadership. I would describe my style of leadership as: a still quiet leader, ability to lead without speaking or dictating to people, dispensing mercy only and if only every other option has been expended, and keeping the peace through well-ordered compassion. It is this type of leadership and only this type of leadership that might save us, but, I see no such leaders. A leader is not quick to act or judge, a leader is not falsely moved, a leader engages all people from the lowest to the highest and keeps the house of kingdom well in peace, and well in order.

When I was very young, I read all the ancient books, studied the cycles of history and known time. All of the things we are doing now: poisoning water, poisoning air, and poisoning "each other" all directly align with what will come to pass if we do not take "the highest road towards peace and action."

I have watched generations from the 1930's, 1940's, 1950's, and 1960's -those who wear the "Great White Crown" -many have already passed or are soon to pass. We are still dealing with poison from the 50's and the 60's of far to many bad "political and religious" leaders. We have been led astray.

We must not build any more weapons of nuclear destruction. We must not build any more nuclear power generators. We must pursue "alternative replenish-able energy technology" and "disease, cancer, and virus medicines and preventive care" as our very immediate future will entire depend upon it.

The Constitution of the US was just an "Ark of Ideas" meant to carry "a Golden Age" possibly far enough along to stop the same destruction that has destroyed many past "Golden Ages". After the "Golden Age" is the "Diamond Age", after the "Diamond Age" is the "Energetic Age". We will not pass the destruction of this "Current Golden Age" unless we can over-come all the "internal evils we manifest externally" towards one another and our world.

I will not list all books and sources, but authors within the 20-21st century all predicted with "science and metaphysics" what would transpire starting in the 1960's, what would eventual pick up and progress towards starting in "2000". Yes, the Mayan calendar was correct, but interpreters did not correctly adjust for displacement of solar and astrological rotations.

...the a wild, infinitely pieced puzzle, spinning like a insane electrical vortex. The faces, the all comes together. 2025 beginning huge amounts of suffering, luke warm water, the greed and domination of bastard and bitch leaders -licking their drunken, blood covered lips. 3rd and 4th world conditions dominate the world -even all across the US and Europe.

The middle east, Asiatic countries nothing more than blood baths. The same in every other part of the world. Military rule, death, and destruction become the rule of the day.

2025 is the beginning of the point of no return towards 2050. After, we will enter pre-apocalyptic states of being. The world ripped and torn asunder. The younger generations born within a 20+ or 20- years of this current date of writing will suffer the most, and, all of the children will either die, or kill one another to simply survive. A great blood-drenched sword is moving upon the world. It is dividing every man, woman, and child against one another.

Right now is the point of no return towards the coming darkness. I talked with my ancient Father about writing about this in order to warn people. Yes, like many other things that I have seen come to pass in my dreams,...................I sincerely fear this one. I could feel my eyes and skin burning. I saw huge numbers of bodies, swirled in flames of water and fire, screaming,...burning............dying.

I have no idea if anyone will read this. For some time, I battled with whether I should write about my vision, and fought against bringing any prophecy to light. In some way, I feel it would be an injustice if I did not bring it forward. I can only sincerely hope and pray it will save a few if any.

If you, whoever you are read this. I beg you to prepare now, prepare and teach your children how to survive, how to flee and how to fight. Separate yourself from cities and large populations. Stay away from large external bodies of water. Get to some place away from "possible targets" military or otherwise. If you can get to "mountains" or places that will protect you from "poisonous air currents" and some place where the "water is pure and has not been poisoned" that is what you "must" do.

There is a part of me that does not want this to happen. All I know is what I have seen and am compelled to share it here. Of all the old and wise US presidents, Ancient Leaders of the past ages of the world, and those who spoke up -it is because of their wisdom that I say these things here.

I hope you will survive the coming darkness.

Sire Lowrimore
Friday, August 18, 2017
~Heavy is the Head who Dares to Wear the Crown~

Thursday, August 17, 2017



Saturday, August 12, 2017

Aug 12 2017 Reflections

...this thing...this blog. In the beginning, my intention was to have a neutral, external place to record thoughts and ideas. As it progressed,...I see it as a "reflecting aid" by which I am able to contemplate my existence and present state. When it pertains to "Goth" I still find it valid as such. So, what is really in a name or path of existence?

...I have been in a fog, between worlds, across multitudes of perception. Perceiving further slowly I have made more progress in meditations. It it one thing to wrap the mind around infinite perceptions, is entirely another to "cease perception and the mind altogether."

Presently, I have gathered more knowledge, careful to not let "study transcend practice." At this point it isn't even remotely academic, for academics are only illusory doors or perceptions unto what end there is not certainty. It is indeed the intention.

The downside of some of the new practice is a lack of sleep, states of physical and mental manifestations for which I can not fully understand. Also, since I have no direct access to a teacher/guru, I made a further extension of effort to call-forth in good intention, with the wish that I might gain favor of a "Yidam" or perhaps ascended energetic guide. I have yet to make the binding-contact, but...I have felt a great presence described by practitioners and am comforted that I am yet on a good path with enlightened guidance.

Combining Yidam with Mandala does lend itself to refining the perceptions and senses in such a way that it is rather impossible to describe the states as they are beyond words. The down side is since I can not find complete isolation at this time, it seems to take a continued great effort to heal the mind from the continuous and various "manifestations of questionable evils in the world." However, I do wish to be careful and tread with caution as to defining evil.

Strange as it is to say, perhaps within a year or so, I already understand that I have  advanced much further than I was aware of. It seems even without great understanding if ones intentions are in the right place -or no place- there is a way to elevate.

Perhaps once I make better progress through the various ascensions, decentions,  along with moving through the spheres into non-perceptions; is a wonder to become, and, to cease.

Perhaps this blog will be left as a strange marker, guide, or transient sign post, hidden in the internet as a guide saying strange things, helping others tread this path of Existence, Gothic or otherwise.

May All Be Auspicious.

Thursday, August 10, 2017

Aug 10th 2017 Reflections

...After interactions with the general public and people close to me, the idea occurred to me that the study of "Demonology and People" are not that different at all. Both seem to deal with suffering, and how we inflict and self-inflict on ourselves and others -knowingly or not.

Demons like people will come at you from any and every direction. Sometimes people like demons are gunning for you through proxy attacks by those you least expect -how tragic and sad. Almost all of the evils attributed and committed by various demons apply directly to people as well. Also, if you attempt to become a better person, the attacks seem to increase. You get called "Holier Than Thou", a "do-Gooder", an "Embarrassment", and essentially worthless to anyone who supposedly considered you "worthy".

It's really, really hard to be a better person when you are struggling and doing everything in your limited power to do so. It is intensely painful -I feel pain everyday. It is extremely difficult because everything is so "gray" and there are no real "right or wrong ways" --- I feel lost, alone, and extreme suffering so much just like so many other people. It literally kills me to know how many are suffering, that I can't do anything about it, and have no certain way to mitigate my own suffering. And no, I don't want to say "that's reality" because I think that is what people who give up say, and that I can not agree with. You can not say there is not a better way until you have proven there is not. I have to admit the quest can make you want to give up. Perhaps this is why I do not seek the fruit of action.

I feel like I am a trillion miles away from people on the other side of the universe in a lost unknown dimension. Like a reflecting god trapped inside a box of infinite mirrors.

In no way what-so-ever do I want anyone to suffer as I know even the littlest form of suffering is too much. I can only wish, pray, and meditate that all escape suffering and attain enlightenment because it is the only thing I can realistically do.

I used to love to socialize all the time. Now, not so much. I never wanted to distance myself from people or the world but, at some point you realize how "weak and powerless" you are to certain forms of abuse and manipulations.

Yes, I was the "free-spirited", crazy-fun-loving, naive type of person. I guess in many ways I still am. I will admit to being subject to powers beyond my ability to understand or control: Loss of love, death and death of loved ones, trying to understand what I can't understand, and attempting to hold on to people and things that were so dear to me.

I'm not the same now I was a second, a day, a year ago. It is as if each day is the continuous "ritual of death and rebirth."

At this point, I meditate, focus on the "clear light", seeking to liberate myself from my "Ego-self" and any and all issues I may or may not suffer from.

The more time I spend in meditation the more I can wisely discern between the lesser grosser aspects of material/materialism, and at times soberly and clearly see through things and see all things.

Our world -and internet, cell-phones, gossip/rumor mill- keep our lives and heads spinning, it is a wonder if anyone can think, live, or exist to some degree without painful distortion.

There was a time I thought of the destruction of my body, mind, and life as a bad thing. Although, I now feel that perception was more of a "ego-program" designed to mitigate what will eventually happen to us all. It does speak to our level of unhealthy ego and attachment to the world and ourselves.

A couple days back while meditating, I completely disappeared -so to speak- and I was not. It wasn't painful, or full of suffering but -when I...came back I guess you could say...for the first time I was able to clearly acknowledge the ability to walk between the worlds and "leave this self behind."

The sad thing about climbing the "great ladder" is that of retrogression. It seems we can make great strides with or without effort, although, to watch it all crash down speaks to "the wheel of suffering" which I am convinced we must escape.

At no other time in my life have I paid attention to life or people in the same way I do now. As fleeting and as impermanent and as transient as all things are, I am conflicted by the tragedy and fragility of our lives and this world.

It is crazy to watch yourself fall apart over time, and yet, in other ways come into elevated fruition. I suppose it would not be so bad if so many were not possessed by "demons" whether self-created or otherwise. It is not so much binary as it is a never-ending infinite gradation of interwoven forces.

Right now, I am between the worlds of "suffering and liberation".

Tuesday, August 8, 2017

Apple (Computers/Technology) and Kentucky Fried Chicken (KFC) Commercials

So, I happened to be watching TV - a sin I know- and I saw an “Apple” and a “Kentucky Fried Chicken” commercial. They both used “Goth” as the “character stereoptype” for their ads.

The Apple commercial used a carbon copy stereotype thought to be Goth. The person used the word “hate”, was all doom and gloom, and basically sold their product on the stereotype. Basically, I felt it was cold, one step away from racism (if you believe Goth to be a race), ignorant, and intentionally defaming of Goths.

I don't "hate" anyone or anything. I'm not the stereotype or all "doom and gloom".

The Kentucky Fried Chicken did basically the same as the Apple Commercial. The commercial painted Goths as “stupid, white, chicken-eating Goths." Oh, and we "so love commercialism" !

I still see it in Movies, on TV, and in every commercial and internet flavor you can think of.

My personal ideology as a Goth tells me to be “indifferent”, “ignore it”, and even “laugh at it.” But, how long do you laugh and they think it is ok to do what they do.

Stereotyping can also be understood as racism, consolidation, tropism, qualifying/quantifying -whatever.

Not sure what else to say other than, “I don’t like it. I’m not as offended as I am let down.” If they will do it to the Goths, then of course they will do it to all.

I don’t have much else for this post. Actually, I feel terribly let down, hurt, and wonder about what they have done.

You know, I have never thought of “Goth/s” as a joke, or stereotype. Goths to me are beautiful, the last of the Great Fringe Children, the only kind of people who ever really accepted me for me.

Goth is the last way of life that many people turn to because all others turned them away. But it seems the world in general thinks of Goth as a joke, and perhaps, even less than dirt.

If it were any other “race, culture, society of people,” I’m sure their commercials might not have been taken the same way, let alone accepted.

I guess making fun of and using Goth’s is easy for the powers that be. Just like all the bullies I have ever faced.

Besides, I can't afford Apple Computer Products or Kentucky Fried Chicken anyway.

I’m hurt.

Monday, August 7, 2017

How to Prepare for Death

A simple primer for learning how to die the right way.

(Might add more to this)

As one who has had a "near-death-experience" I think you should consider these things.

Depending on your religious, philosophical, ideology, or general perception of life will directly shape your perceptions at your time of death.

If you are Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, Muslim, Native, Wiccan; The "way" you believe will be how your interpretation of the transition will happen.

The way you live your life, or worship, or pray, or meditate is all apart of that "pre-trip experience."

So, how do you prepare for this? During my "near-death experience," much of what I had studied in many areas of the "esoteric occult" and "parts" of many religions came to my awareness during the experience.

The way you think, what you were doing, and the type of "state" that you "are in" at that very moment have direct impacts upon the transition.

I suggest reading: "The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying" not as a religion but as a "technical science manual". Also, the "Egyptian Book of the Dead" in a similar fashion.

When people speak of the "Light" that they see is a "high energy gateway" if you will. Now, if you are scared, intensely evil, attached to materialism -you can cause your "energy form" to get stuck. You could wind up in Limbo between worlds. You might go to a perceptual state of "hell" if you are evil so-to-speak. Or depending on your pure energy form, you might go to a certain frequency of what "you might interpret" as Heaven. Of course, there are infinite varieties of "states of existence". This might include "transmigration" if that is what you believe in.

Study "Astral Travel" -not for the stupid "new ager" movement and all the other modern-day garbage, but for the theory. Same for "Remote Viewing". The idea is that in your "energy form" (Thy Will Be Done), basically your "will-force" is how you will "move, exist, travel, ascend" so-to-speak.

This sounds "Inception-ish" but get your self a "perception state reality device". This could be a watch, a compass, a top -something you can manipulate. Like if you are awake the dream rules may or may not apply. So, when you are awake, get in the habit of checking your device. Bend it, make it move, make it do something that it is not supposed to do. If it does something, then you know you are in another state. This applies to getting into the habit of "lucid dreaming". This is all practice for the "death-transitions."

When the time comes, surround yourself with good people, in a good place, and keep "elevated positive thoughts in your mind." Think of yourself as "high in energy, positive in thought."

At the moment when it occurs, you will find yourself between worlds. When the "Light or Energy Gate" appears, do not hesitate. Go directly into, through, or what have you. In addition, your life, knowledge, and perception will directly affect what you see at that time. Keep that in mind.

Let go of materialism and this world. It will cause you pain if you look back and think you are losing anything. You may find yourself transitioned into a state lesser than what you may deserve.

The "greater the level of Peace and Happiness" you have and are surrounded by at the time of your transition will make the experience less painful.

My current "perception state reality device" : Lensatic Compass

My Mantra for transition: "Into the Light".

Saturday, July 29, 2017

Tapestry of our Karma - Poem

Tapestry of our Karma
Thread Universal Dharma
Our Cause and Effect Self Owned
Action and Reaction Equal
We are Neither Created Nor Destroyed
Evil flows from Evil Flows
Good Flows from the Good Flows, Om

May your Sanchita Karma be paid full
May your Prarabdha Karma Compassionate
May your Kriyamana karma be of Sweetest Love

Influenced by: "The Law of Cause and Effect" by "C.W. Leadbeater.Published in 1912
Theosophical Publishing House, Adyar, Chennai [Madras] India
The Theosophist Office, Adyar, Madras. India

Monday, July 24, 2017

Perfect People in the Media

Perfect People in the Media

All the time I see Perfect People in the Media
Perfect Teeth Perfect Bodies Perfect everything
Maybe it is the vanity of illusion all the greedier
I wonder what it is like to have that star ring

Imperfect in my shell dealing with pain everyday
Locked in a imperfect hell send sedation on the way
If I were a star and had millions I could be perfect too
But I'm sure it will be too late before my time is through

All the time I see Perfect People in the Media
Perfect Smiles Perfect Health Perfect Everything
Maybe my path wasn't ment for the blissful "ah"
I wonder what it would be like without the sting

Of not being a Perfect Person

Once, I, beautiful
illusion the cruel ruse laugh
Once, no more mirror breaks me